Our anonymous author tell us why Misogamists are wrong when they blame the institution of marriage without event looking into the reasons of why is it failing. A must read.
This post put me in an inebriated frame of morbidity; first because, I am currently reading the suitable boy, and second, partly due to the whole concept of marriage as an institution that we have built. For me the reason, why marriage is an institution is because, it has stood the Test of time. Another reason why it’s an institution is because, any institution which embeds itself in humour and self-loathing, yet continues to survive is an institution.
The misogamists in our society, like a fellow author pointed about, draws on a crux, which has been prevailing in society since time-immemorial. For instance, when Anuj pointed out the significant increase in wants and comfort, and money after the marriage, little did one think that the origin of marriage was based on the concept of economics. A societal structure was created to preserve wealth, pass on wealth to generations and showcase the survival of fitness.
Why then are the misogamists complaining? If you look at the construct of marriage, it has evolved, through expected rig morale of expectations. Today it is even more visible. Take any matrimonial website, if the girl is fair, she wants a richer, smarter, better, astute looking husband. Try this, use the same photograph, same qualifications, and same job; however increase the salary by 40,000 a month and a significant increase in expectations arise. Why won’t immaturity between couples arise and conflict take its place. The system didn’t become this way, the system was designed this way. Another way to date an Indian girl is contact your astrologer and connect with your girls’ astrologer. If they are commensurate, the date happens.
I don’t want to be a marriage counsellor, but I think, no amount of medicine can help an ailing society. If the crux of marriages has to saved, it has to begin from the beginning, the same way; Vishnu did come up with avatar after an avatar to save the society, though Lord Shiva preferred destruction.
For the whole institution of marriages, we need to break the system and bring a new one. I can’t speculate, how the new system would want to be, but to emerge an institution based on a legal contract is baffling, I’d save grace to Anuj when he mentioned the reasons marriages can be viewed in a positive way. These could answer the question of, why should marriage, be a legal contract. Arranged marriages technically are statutory rates, taking the stated down measure of the first night.
One solution (which may not be practical, but a judgement call for self-illusory tendencies) is to strip down the very essence why marriages don’t work and look beyond to see, if a sub structure can sustain itself in a metaphysical verse. For instance, strip the education, caste, creed, religion, gotra, colour, race, education, employment, size, height, weight, region, city, country, expectations. You will get nothing, the nothing, which is the silence in the storm, precedes love and unconditional love can yet, save this entire institution of marriage.